I Don't Need Presents...I Just Need You

Beautiful Dark Blue Eyes

They stood face to face in the dining-room....decorated with indie-rock posters....as the afternoon sunlight filtered through the nets at the rear window. It wasn't so much a slow dance...more a wavering embrace and a meeting of precious minds...as the song skipped along.

'Oh when I look into those beautiful big blue eyes
You could have told me that you'd be the one who lies
I'd still be loving you and I'd be the one who cries
When I look into those beautiful big blue eyes'

'I like the song' she said ' but I don't need presents...I just need you'
Not much else was said for a while...it wasn't needed....they were speechless.

'Big blue eyes....like a swimming-pool'

'I'm going swimming tomorrow' she laughed 'but it's irrelevant'

A spider observed them from it's highly complex home....at the top of the kitchen door...just near the 'Different Class' poster.

'I do love you so much' he said...as he gently grasped her be-cardiganed arm and slung it around his waist.

It wasn't a great song for a slow dance....but it didn't matter. The routine transcended the music. It could have been any song on that Toshiba Sum95 hi-fi. (available from all good dealers for a snip at £425)
It could have been Metallica...or it could have been Crystal Castles.
Heavy Metal v Cut-Glass.
Master of Puppets v Fetus Fatale.
It could have been Bowie, Brett or Beethoven. It didn't matter.

He drew back and looked into her eyes. He knew that she was beautiful and that he should consider himself to be the luckiest man in the world....just for having her in his arms...but it didn't matter. It wasn't luck. It was all that he deserved. He'd been nice to animals for all of his life. He opened doors for strangers and he laughed at people's jokes...even when they weren't funny. He was a good man....misunderstood at times...but a good man nonetheless. This was his pay-off...his reward in life. A lifetime in waiting...and he was entwined in formidable embrace with the most beautiful girl in the world.

She smiled sweetly.

The spider ran across Jarvis Cocker's nose.

The sunlight bathed them both in a bloodthirsty rapture.

He could have fallen to the ground..swooned like a felled tree...as he looked into the iridescent pool of dark blue ink in her eyes. In truth...her beauty was understated. She wasn't supposed to be perfect...that would never do. To him...perfection was far too shallow...and he felt lucky knowing that she didn't seem to be a slave to perfection herself. He had many faults...physically...and he often wondered why she even took the time to notice him...to talk to him...to keep him in her story. Yet...here he was...in the most private section of her world. In her space. In her arms.

He pushed back her hair with the blade-edge of his right hand...in a cataclysmic move to expose the delicate angel's sweetly pitted forehead.

'What are you thinking now? she asked

'Ah...that I've never felt such a feeling for someone...ever...even over my long life'

'But I am small'

'Napoleon was small...he defined the political and military power during the latter stages of the French Revolution'

'I can't do that' she harrumphed...with metamorphic bottom lip.

'You have started a revolution in my heart'

As they danced...in loose dance terms...her face fell against his chest...and his hand moved slowly up and down her leg. It wasn't a conscious action...it wasn't deliberate.

'I wonder why you like me?' she said

'I love you'

'I'm just a girl'

He shook his head

'You are more than just a girl...you are more than just a collection of vital organs...brain, heart, lungs, kidneys, liver and pancreas. Everyone has them...if they're lucky. I can't explain how on Earth one person can fall in love with just one person...when there are all these billions of people in the world. There's no explanation'

'How many people are there in the world? she quipped

'Clearly an exact answer would be insane, but I'm under the impression that the count stands at around seven billion....but can we stick to the matter in hand please...you cheeky scamp?'

The spider edged away from Jarvis...as a fly landed on it's beautifully complicated web.

The man gazed into the beautifully elaborate structure of the girl's eyes...and marvelled at nature's true genius. More technical and intricate than a Canon SVL15 camera...single-lens-reflex...auto-shutter speed. (£399 at all good retailers) The camera was no match for nature's own convolution. The girl's eyes cost nothing...and yet...they were priceless. No millionaire could buy the allure of the girl he desired to make his own. The grace of the girl with ink-blue eyes was simply not within monetary deliverance.

Their heads moved closer as his hand traversed her thigh...and...at this stage...she could no longer hear the music. The sound was irrelevant. It didn't matter. No sense of music...or of time. The most beautiful moment of their time together...the first kiss...was rapidly approaching...as the spider chewed on the apprehended gristle of a common housefly.

Beauty...nature...consequence.

Their lips were close. They felt the static swell of love as they moved closer. The moment..the very first twinkling of a 'first kiss' was upon them. Her eyes closed. His eyes opened. His eyes closed. Her eyes opened. Their eyes closed...together.

The Moment.....

In another land...a scientist would be dissecting an alien in a secret laboratory...but it didn't matter.

In another part of the world...a child would be vomiting into an earthenware pot...but it didn't matter.

In a foreign province...a team of vain overpaid footballers would be spitting at eachother under artificial light...but it didn't matter.

'Why did you pull away?' she asked

'Because I want to be sure that you really want this kiss'

'I do'

'Thank you'

They moved closer...again. His eyes were closed. Her eyes were closed.
He knew it was the right time. Their lips were about to connect...2 millimetres apart.

The spider spat out the remains of the fly. The soft, sticky remnants of it's prey spattered onto the face of Kurt Cobain. The spider had smelled the teen-spirit of the fly...and it wanted more.

Particles of dust rained down upon the clothes-horse...illuminated by the sunlight.

'Why did you pull away?' he asked

'Because' she replied 'I want to be sure it's me you want...not just a conquest'

'Never...I love you more than ever'

She wondered if the kiss would ever happen.
He wondered if the kiss would ever happen.

She fluffed out her chest and drew herself up to her full Napoleonic height.

'Just fucking kiss me'

They kissed.

The world didn't end.

The music stopped.

The spider looked down...but it just didn't know.

Jarvis Cocker sang erratically in Belgium...but he just didn't know.

The man who thought that a certain girl...with ink-blue eyes...was the most beautiful girl in the world...shed a tear.

The whole world was against them...but it just didn't matter.

<3